There are so many possible things to say about today. The most popular one will be about the Hallmark of today. The generic-ness, forced love that was encouraged by jewelry stores. Sure, that’s obvious, but what has it given us? It’s forced every to think about love and how it affects us.
Our culture is riddled with stories on how to love and how love should be and look like in movies, songs, and literature. Love has been placed on an unrealistic pedestal or is seen as cheesy, an embarrassment when admitted to someone or themselves.
Unfortunately, those without a significant other, the single folk, sometimes end up feeling like rejects. Unworthy of love. Forced into being tortured because they often feel like they’ve done wrong in the eyes of love. There are those in new relationships that feel the pressure of today and the need to live up to the standards or instead act like they’re “too cool” for this holiday.
Today is a Holiday.
Today is Valentine’s Day.
Let’s change the original meaning or intention (I don’t even remember the story of it’s origin and frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn).
Valentine’s Day is about Love. The first person to love (enter cheese factor) is YOU. Let’s really think about this for a second. If you don’t love and respect yourself, how can you love someone else? You really can’t give love if there’s none within you in the first place. So give yourself love. It’s normal to feel ultra weird about this, which is due to our fabulous culture. But whatever. Eff it. Throw out culture. Throw out norms. Isn’t it more fun to say “I’m Awesome” than “I suck”? Each human is awesome. And that’s another thing. You are human. You are naturally a fuck-up in some way/shape/form. Accept that shit. If you want to change things you don’t like, take the time to change them. Have patience with yourself. I mean, you do have a whole lifetime to do what you want with who you are as a human. If you mess up, you mess up. Accept fault and move on.
Ok. So love yourself. Got it? Moving on.
“Yes and” the Love. Valentine’s Day is about giving love. Let’s not hinder on the shiftiness of Valentine’s Day. All that’s gonna do is make you feel like crap, and that is not the goal here. So you’re lovin’ on yourself, let’s spread that love around. Weird again, right? Stupid culture! Eff it again! Grab coffee with a friend and focus on their stories. Go smile at a stranger. Seriously. That small smile will lighten that person’s day. I mean, don’t get all creepy about it and force a smile, but look up at a person in their eyes and smile. Listen to your gut and it won’t be weird. You’ll know when the time is right to make a nice gesture. Let someone cut in line in front of you, put money in a meter when you’re leaving a spot, tell someone you don’t know that you think they’re cute/attractive. I did this once. It wasn’t on V-day. It was a random day. I was in a good mood and I decided I was going to tell one person that they looked good. I was sitting on the subway on the way into the city, and a man sat next to me. I told him he looked great today. He said, “Thank you. You really made my day.” Then he briefly told me how things haven’t been that great for him lately, but he now just felt better about things. How cool is that?
“Yes and” the Love pimps. Got that one? Ok. Nicely done.
You’re already loved. You may not know it, but people love you. I have no idea how many, but they’re there. Since admitting love is such a weird thing to do in our culture, certain people may not have told you they love you when they really do. Another thing is that there a TONS of different kinds of love. It’s not always romantic, but it’s just as valuable. All levels of love are great. Even love and respect for a stranger. It’s there. Open your eyes. If loving yourself is new and you start doing that, more love will pour around you and you’ll become aware of it. It’s pretty cool.
I suggest you do or think of these things everyday, not just today. Today is just a day where Love is place on the tippy top of our minds.
Here’s my deal. I am single. I have lots of love in my life. I will someday have balanced, romantic, respected love with a man, and it’s gonna fuckin’ rock. Until then, I love myself, my family, friends, pets and whatever else needs some loving. Today will not be spent in bitterness, but in appreciation for past and present relationships. I am happy. I am healthy. I am loved. And so are you.